For the past few months, I have rolled out the welcome mat, so to speak, for my hopeful new guest. Anything to make the best possible warm, cozy home so they will take roost and stay awhile. At the appropriate, calculated time the welcome wagon arrives with its troops to await Guest’s arrival with open arms. I even try to send reinforcements, just so my Guest will know how much they are wanted. Yet every month to my extreme devastation, Guest does not stay. I have to go to the stables and saddle up the ponies for their rude departure. And this impolite Guest never leaves quietly. Oh no! They stomp all over me, causing reverberating waves of physical pain. What is so vile about the room I have that causes the Guest to snub their nose at me? I am not a horrible host. I would care for this Guest like no other. Whatever their hearts desired, it would be provided with the utmost of love. That unconditional, undying kind of love. Its waiting…all the Guest has to do is stay…and grow and experience this love.
But today it did not. Today I grieve. I grieve a little more each time my invitation is rebuffed because I fear with each passing month, the guest will never want to stay. It will pass, hopefully, and I will begin to prepare again. I must be positive, good things occurs in the positive light. But not today- today I grieve.